Holiday Grief Anxiety

If there's one thing you can count on when you're grieving, it's that no matter how good you get at dealing with grief, certain times of year are guaranteed to be a massive trigger. Like your loved one's birthday, death anniversary, and the dreaded holiday season.

Why does grief show up as anxiety during the holidays? The answer here is all about the anticipation of those grief bombs. You know, the kind that hits so hard you ask yourself, "Do I know anything about dealing with my grief?" If you're worried about managing anxious-grief holiday feelings, I got you! Check out my top tips and connect with me for one-on-one grief support this holiday season.

You Can Change Your Mind

If you get overwhelmed with grief this year, give yourself permission to change your mind. Let's say you volunteered to host, but as the date approaches, you start to feel exhausted by your grief. Instead of pushing yourself to do too much, change your mind and ask someone else to take over. Early on in my grief, there were days I felt wishy-washy when I had to back out of something. It's not that I was unreliable; I was trying to stay afloat! Sometimes I felt bad when I had to change my mind, but no one else cared. So, if you need to make adjustments while managing your grief, just do it.

You Can Do Something Different

Whatever you do around the holidays this year doesn't have to become a new tradition. If the usual holiday traditions aren't speaking to you this year, do something different. That doesn't mean you have to completely abandon your favorite traditions forever; they will still be there next year if you want them. Many of us think the holidays need to look the same to be special, but that's not always possible. Don't stress and try something new; it might even be fun! I've celebrated differently each holiday season since my dad died, and I know many people in the same boat since dealing with covid the past two years.

You Can Opt-Out

If holiday grief anxiety gets to you, I give you permission to skip certain things altogether! You can still enjoy lots of good things during the holiday season without pushing yourself to be at everything. I told my people in the early grief days that I'd try to be part of things as much as I could, but no guarantees. Communicating that really took the pressure off. Looking back, I wish I had said this more often, and I totally get how hard this one can be. But the people who love you will understand.

The Botton Line

As much as I hated to admit it to myself, grief meant I couldn't operate at one hundred percent. This is probably true for you, too; grief is exhausting! But no matter how long it's been since your loved one died, the holidays might always be anxiety-provoking for you. So know that you can change your mind, do something different, or opt-out this year. If it's hard to give yourself permission, you can borrow it from me. If you want to talk more about your holiday grief anxiety, I'd love to chat! Reach out, and we will find a time to connect soon.